Tips to Find The Right Healer For You.

The focus of this article is not to determine who is the best healer or a good healer, but the right healer for you! The following tips come from my personal experience as well as what I've heard other people go through trying to find a healer.

There are things that I wished I had known when I was new to this "spiritual healing world" that I had no clue about, and had I known better I wouldn't have these experiences, and I wouldn't be writing this article now. In a way it was written in the stars that I would learn about this the hard way in order to share with you below.

As you might know, maybe you don't, maybe this is the first time you find my blog. I came into energy healing to help myself heal because I couldn't find any solutions with traditional medicine. At the time and for several years since starting my energy healing journey I didn't know I was being emotionally abused. It was through emotional healing that I was able to see it. And once I saw it, I could read about it, and then finally find healers and therapists that could help me. There was no way for a traditional doctor to find my emotional trauma.

Whether you are looking for a shaman, an energy healer, a spiritual healer, psychic healer, intuitive healer, there are so many titles for this profession because we get to use the title we think fits best, outside of traditional training. Each training school has it's own name for their practitioners, from Chinese Medicine, to Acupuncturist, to Reiki healer. And no one should expect you to know what that means.

Tip #1: Ask Questions!

​What Type of Training and Experience Do You Have?

Did you learn by yourself or are you self-trained? Because some are.
or
Did you learn a specific technique?
There are so many different techniques out there that I would waste my time naming any more than the ones I already have, but I have a list with about 70 types of trainings that a healer can choose to become certified in.

How long have you been practicing?
If you don’t know about the technique, this is your opportunity to ask them to explain it to you. It can be challenging as a newer healer to explain the fullness of the technique in simple words, so don’t take this as a bad sign. Some people are natural born healers and they just need some light instruction to hit the ground running. Do know that there is a difference between being a competent healer and knowing how to deal with clients. Generally, the longer a healer has been in practice the more comfortable they will be talking to clients. Of course you can run into an incompetent healer that has a silver tongue. This is why it's important to continue getting to know the healer.

Do you use healing on a regular basis?
There seems to be this misconception that healers are these perfect beings without any problems. Even if they are instructors or simply just practitioners, being a healer means that they are tasked with healing themselves and they have just as many obstacles as everyone else.

Healers are not perfect, you want to find one that at least is trying to improve themselves first. Someone that has done the work on themselves, has benefitted from healing, and practices self-healing as much as they promote it.

You can also ask them What they like about using that technique over other techniques for your issue? Get to know your healer because they will be getting to you know on a deep level too. At least I do in my sessions.

In my time as a healer I have received healing from others with different techniques and there are some that I really enjoy that I’m not planning on becoming trained in. I can recommend them and that technique because of the healing it brought to my life. Some techniques require at least 2 people and therefore self-healing with that specific technique is not possible.

What Have You Been Able To Heal?

With this question you are asking what is your specialty? This generally comes from what they have healed for themselves and the reason the majority of their return clients seek them.

This goes in line with any other professional, from the way you find a therapist to a medical specialist, except that with healers, it’s all about how they have overcome that obstacle for themselves in relation to how well they can help you overcome it too. There is a wise saying by Gene Mauch that reads: "You can't lead anyone else further than you have gone yourself."

Early on, I made the mistake of thinking that people with higher positions than me in any healing category were more experienced in a variety of things. I asked a LOT of them about how to deal with abuse and almost none had any experience dealing with that topic and even less healing it.

​The best advice I got were some recommendations for certain things that I had to do on my own, and I did, and it did help me, but I found the most healing with a trauma therapist and then applying self-healing to the process to help my emotional body and mental body get on the same page. Every healer has a speciality, find out what it is and decide from there if they are compatible with your healing goals.

​You really don’t want to waste your time and energy on someone that doesn’t have the experience and training in what you are looking to heal. Granted sometimes you don't know what needs healing and any step towards healing is better than none at all. That's why I offer an energy healing reading on my site. This way we can map out a healing plan that is tailored to you! I'll leave a direct link below for easy access.

Tip #2: The Intention Of The Healer Shapes Your Session

​You want to know these things about a healer before you book a session with them because their intention has the power to make or break your session. As noted in The Divine Matrix Bridging Time, Space, Miracles, and Belief written by Gregg Braden; Key 10 states: “Not just any feeling will do. The ones that create must be without ego and judgment.” and Key 16 “The key to healing is the ability to focus emotions and energy in our bodies or that of a loved one (with the person’s permission) in a non-invasive and compassionate way.”

Does the healer hope that their session can help you or do they KNOW that their session can help you?

Hopefully they have had a conversation with you about your healing goals and have determined to their best of their knowledge and experience that they are the best fit for you. In the first few years of my practice I didn’t have this understanding. I thought that someone else recommending me was enough to determine that compatibility instead of creating my own guidelines for who I know I can help.

​As a professional healer, you have to know your abilities as much as your limitations, if your intention is to help others, then it must be without ego and judgment.

Tip #3: ​Are they a spiritual practitioner or do they have a medical background or both?

​This comes down to personal preference and to facilitate communication between you.

Some healers like myself are all about spiritual topics and concepts and use the least amount of medical intervention as possible. I personally get uncomfortable listening to medical procedures and I know very little about the meaning of test results. I focus my practice on emotional and mental energy healing and leave the physical body to other practitioners. I do understand how energy healing eventually reaches the physical body, therefore I do not mind working with doctors as long as they don’t mind working with me to find a holistic solution for the person we’re trying to help.

My techniques go straight to the root of the problem when the problem can’t be solved on the physical level. I work with crystals, numerology, and Tarot in my sessions, and I keep tabs for how an astrological transit may be affecting the collective and therefore the client. I offer perspectives about situations from a purely energetic source. If you are not open or interested in learning how subtle energy affects your health, it will be challenging for us to communicate beyond one session.

Other healers have a therapy-background and use it in conjunction with their sessions; this is true for massage therapists and psychologists. Other healers have a medical background, they work with doctors, or they work in a hospital settings, there are many registered nurses trained in Reiki. There are also healers that used to be in the medical field that now work in natural or holistic healing but they still have that medical knowledge. As long as the communication feels natural in both directions you will be in good hands.

Pick a healer that talks your language and what matters to you. I have used energy healing on myself while being treated by doctors and I find it to work wonders because all aspects of my being are receiving healing. And I do think it’s important to work with others to take care of yourself. Especially when you’ve been dealing with something for many years, the longer it goes unresolved, the more variety of healing you have to look for.

Tip #4: ​Consent Matters

When it comes to removing any article of clothing, taking pictures of your naked body, or bringing in another person into your session without discussing in advance is a big red flag. If any of this needs to happen you should be notified well in advanced and given time to think if you are ok with it or not before proceeding.

This red flag can be made bigger when the healer gets upset with you and expects you to trust them because they know more! This is unkind and disrespectful behavior. It is the opposite of compassionate and healing. 

Whether you are working with a healer or a medical professional, make sure that you feel safe! That they are not mistreating or disrespecting you! Any healer that doesn’t explain what they are going to do, especially when it comes to putting you in a vulnerable position, is someone to reconsider. These “healers” often sound authoritative, impatient, and cold, and because the client is already feeling unwell and figures "this person is the expert" they feel that they need to go along with it, only to later feel violated or confused by the treatment.

I have experienced this with medical professionals as well, where they just treat your body with complete carelessness and send you home in pain feeling disrespected. I know you can relate to this example, and this is just one of many real life examples; we all know the nurse that keeps poking your arm for a blood test where you end up covered in bruises, and then the nurse has the audacity to blame you for it! That is not a healer!

In Summary

Ask as many questions as you need to feel comfortable and safe with the healer you are interested in working with. Does it feel or sound like they want to help you or are they doing this for an ulterior motive? Do you understand what they are saying or do you feel comfortable asking for clarification of what they are saying? And do you feel valued and respected during your interactions with them?

I hope that this article has brought you some clarity and guidance on how to find the right healer for you and that it helps you on your healing journey.

Stefanie Bentes

Spiritual advisor and Reiki healer